This morning, I'm participating in my first-ever Round Table Discussion. Please click the link above to see what it's all about! My apologies to other participants if I haven't done this correctly. It's my first time, and I'm still learning the ropes here.
Corinne Alexander is hosting today's discussion, and she suggested the following questions as a jumping-off point.
What appeals to you about DD?
This is, surprisingly, a somewhat difficult question to answer. It seems odd that I would be attracted to discipline, especially in that it is often viewed as punishment. Why would I want my husband to punish me? I think maybe it's best to make a distinction between the two. Punishment is merely the act of administering a consequence for wrong behavior. Discipline uses punishment as a tool to help teach someone.
I love that my husband will help teach me to be a better person. I love that he will help me tame these character flaws of mine, hold me accountable, and make sure I take care of myself and our relationship.
Our DD dynamic is a means of conflict resolution that, although unorthodox, certainly does help us both.
When all is said and done, the rules I have in place, and the dynamic we have, makes me feel important to him. I feel like he cares enough about me to make sure I'm safe. I feel like he values our relationship enough that he won't allow discord to push us apart. This is all just the tip of the iceburg. At the heart of it all is that DD makes me feel loved.
What does not appeal to you about DD?
Mostly, what doesn't appeal to me is the stigma attached.
Thankfully, there is a large, vibrant, supportive community of people just like us, and that has made a tremendous difference. However, what we do flies in the face of all things modern and progressive! I let him make the decisions. I follow his lead. I let my husband spank me. Even among DD folks, sometimes I share things that cause others to pull back, so sometimes it's hard being the wife that is taken in hand.
Do you practice any form of DD?
Yes. We are Dominant/Submissive couple and DD is part of our dynamic.
What do you think are some common misconceptions of DD?
When I first heard of DD, I thought it was awful. Archaic! What a domineering, awful thing to do to a wife! I really didn't know how comforting my husband's discipline could be. I had no idea how much closer we would be brought together. So I would say the most common misconception of DD is that it is a harmful dynamic to have in a relationship. Some say that it is like a parent-child relationship. Some say it is abuse. It is neither.
If you practice any form of DD, what have been the greatest joys it has brought to you?
I have never been happier. My husband Jason and I are deeply, intimately connected to one another in a way that is much more intense that it was before. We communicate so much more effectively. We are about as close to one another as a couple can get. The intimate connection, the eroticism, the necessity of communication, the raw honesty of it all, has brought us closer together than I ever would've thought possible.
What are the greatest challenges?
DD is hard work. There is a constant give and take and it takes enormous emotional energy, from both of us. When we have had our challenges, the times have been low. The highs are high, and the lows are low, and riding that emotional roller coaster can be difficult.
At the end of the day, our DD dynamic has changed our lives. It has led us into a deeper D/S dynamic I never knew possible that is deeply erotic and immensely satisfying, and honestly? We've never been happier.
Thanks for hosting, Corinne. I look forward to reading along with everyone else!
If any reader would like to respond to any of the above questions in the comment section below, please do. I'd love to hear from you!
Please have a look at the other discussion participants!